...so you better get this party started. Pink 2001

Hello there and welcome once again to another episode of The Couch's View. What can we see from here?

CENSORSHIP!

"What? What's that", you say. "Another nutcase with a buzzword to push?" No, I am not about to go on some psycho rant, there are plenty of Facebook posts, comments sections and more dark and dirty alleyways of the Internet to find that. I am talking about self-censorship and the giant mental cork it sticks in the creative flow. I started this blog with every intention of writing in it on a (semi-)regular basis. Then something hit my brain and I became afraid, very afraid.

What was I afraid of? Just that you KNOW me. The real person. Jeff Couch. This is not anonymous. If I post my thoughts, ideas, and opinions, I will be held accountable. I will be questioned. Worse, I might be...gasp...judged. I loathe being judged. I have quit jobs because I couldn't handle the constant threat of judgement. I fear what might happen if I actually have an opinion on something, and let people know about it.

Most of my life I have cultivated an attitude of acceptance. I might not agree with you, but I want to hear what you have to say and not belittle or trash you regardless of what it is. I am willing to discuss it rationally with you, because I value you and your opinion. I have seen it happen with others and had it happen to me too many times. The minute you believe something, or dare to question, you are torn to pieces by the wolves. The wolves, these people who are so insecure in their own belief system that they can't stand anyone to question it, or think to deeply about it. Here is an opinion for you. If the truth is true, it can stand up to any scrutiny. There is no need to fear scrutiny. God is bigger than your boogeyman.

So...I have been afraid. But I feel like not talking is the same as agreeing, and there are some things I just don't agree with. I am not looking to rant and rave, just to discuss what is going on in this world, our world, my world. Sometimes this will be very personal. Other times more general. May it cause waves in my extended family and friends? Probably. Do I have the guts to really open up? I don't know. All I know is this blog must be written, if not for anyone else, than for my own sanity. If anyone else reads it, then so be it. I really hope you do, and that it makes you think. I don't need agreement, just thought.

Most likely, now that I have been all dramatic, I will just write about cute, interesting and mundane stuff. I tend to make a big deal out of nothing. Maybe that is what is going to happen, but I don't think so. There is some stuff I want to talk about, and it is past time that we do. I'm coming out of my hiding place, and I'm going to talk about what it means to be an overweight, middle-aged, father, Christian, thinker, creative, white guy that struggles with the stereotype definitions of every one of those things. Keep reading, you might be surprised.

Settle in, for the Couch's View.

(Some of you more astute readers may have realized I just talked about revealing opinions etc., without actually saying anything about what I think. So here you go. At the risk of alienating a lot of my "open-minded, progressive" friends I will admit I voted for McCain in 2008. At the risk of alienating most of my family and my "conservative Christian" friends, I voted for Obama in 2012.

I am not saying I made a good choice in either case. I find it hard to be as dead certain about this things as just about everyone else is.The sad thing is, I have been afraid to admit either one, because I don't want to lose these relationships I care so much about. That says a whole lot more about who we are as a society than who I voted for does.)